Hi Does anyone have any "good" H&S related Christmas jokes that I can use ?
Thanks & Merry Christmas all
T
H&S Christmas jokes
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TWDB
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H&S Christmas jokes
Update: taken a new job 
hopefully confidence and positivity will return with new challenge - scary though leaving current place after 16 years (6 years H&S !) 
(previous signature: was motivated once ..................... searching to get it back !
)
hopefully confidence and positivity will return with new challenge - scary though leaving current place after 16 years (6 years H&S !) (previous signature: was motivated once ..................... searching to get it back !
)-
grim72
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Re: H&S Christmas jokes
Did you hear the one about the guy putting up the Xmas lights on the roof his curry house? Last I heard he fell from a dodgy ladder and he's been in a korma ever since.
I'll get my coat
Or of course there is an abundance of "elf" and safety references to be had. BTW what do you call a female elf? Yup, a shelf.
I haven't even opened my xmas cracker jokes yet lol
I'll get my coat
Or of course there is an abundance of "elf" and safety references to be had. BTW what do you call a female elf? Yup, a shelf.
I haven't even opened my xmas cracker jokes yet lol
Grim72
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Good to Go Safety - Providing you with a safer workplace
Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in his shoes. That way, when you criticize him, you're a mile away and you have his shoes
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Alexis
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Re: H&S Christmas jokes
No wonder your Username is Grim!!!! 
Santa went to the Doctors with a problem.
Doctor: What seems to be the problem?
Santa: I seem to have a mince pie stuck up my bottom!
Doctor: Well your in luck because I've got just the cream for that!
(Moderate? Naaaaaa.........it's one of the wee classic cheeky (and as riskyyy as allowed, without not even knowing perhaps what it means) jokes that Children love to do as their party-piece prior to face turning a bit deep red and them having to run out of the room.)
Santa went to the Doctors with a problem.
Doctor: What seems to be the problem?
Santa: I seem to have a mince pie stuck up my bottom!
Doctor: Well your in luck because I've got just the cream for that!
(Moderate? Naaaaaa.........it's one of the wee classic cheeky (and as riskyyy as allowed, without not even knowing perhaps what it means) jokes that Children love to do as their party-piece prior to face turning a bit deep red and them having to run out of the room.)
"A candle loses none of its light by lighting another candle."
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TWDB
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Re: H&S Christmas jokes
Anyone got any good ones for this year?
Thanks
Trevor
Thanks
Trevor
Update: taken a new job hopefully confidence and positivity will return with new challenge - scary though leaving current place after 16 years (6 years H&S !)
(previous signature: was motivated once ..................... searching to get it back !)
hopefully confidence and positivity will return with new challenge - scary though leaving current place after 16 years (6 years H&S !) (previous signature: was motivated once ..................... searching to get it back !
)-
Blackstone
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Re: H&S Christmas jokes
How do the elves clean Santa's sleight after christmas?
They use Santa-tizer!
They use Santa-tizer!
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Alexis
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Re: H&S Christmas jokes
Oh! Dear! Is this the signs of more to come in this post!Blackstone wrote: ↑Tue Dec 14, 2021 4:49 pm How do the elves clean Santa's sleight after christmas?
They use Santa-tizer!
Just because it's your Birthday, I will humour you and laugh.
Anyone else have an even more rubbishy one??
"A candle loses none of its light by lighting another candle."
Hundreds of FREE Health & Safety Downloads Here
Hundreds of FREE Health & Safety Downloads Here
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Blackstone
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Re: H&S Christmas jokes
Alexis wrote: ↑Wed Dec 15, 2021 9:36 amOh! Dear! Is this the signs of more to come in this post!Blackstone wrote: ↑Tue Dec 14, 2021 4:49 pm How do the elves clean Santa's sleight after christmas?
They use Santa-tizer!
Just because it's your Birthday, I will humour you and laugh.
Anyone else have an even more rubbishy one??
Thanks Alexis!'Train people well enough so they can leave, treat them well enough that they don't want to!' - Richard Branson
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TWDB
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Re: H&S Christmas jokes
Keep them coming guys !!
thanks T
Update: taken a new job hopefully confidence and positivity will return with new challenge - scary though leaving current place after 16 years (6 years H&S !)
(previous signature: was motivated once ..................... searching to get it back !)
hopefully confidence and positivity will return with new challenge - scary though leaving current place after 16 years (6 years H&S !) (previous signature: was motivated once ..................... searching to get it back !
)-
TWDB
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- Joined: Thu Apr 11, 2013 3:24 pm
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Re: H&S Christmas jokes
Christmas Carol - Xmas 2021
"Oh, the weather outside is frightful,
And its best to be very careful
So if you've got some place to go
Lateral flow, Lateral flow, Lateral flow."
T
"Oh, the weather outside is frightful,
And its best to be very careful
So if you've got some place to go
Lateral flow, Lateral flow, Lateral flow."
T
Update: taken a new job hopefully confidence and positivity will return with new challenge - scary though leaving current place after 16 years (6 years H&S !)
(previous signature: was motivated once ..................... searching to get it back !)
hopefully confidence and positivity will return with new challenge - scary though leaving current place after 16 years (6 years H&S !) (previous signature: was motivated once ..................... searching to get it back !
)-
wendolene26
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TWDB
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Re: H&S Christmas jokes
Any one got any good ones for this year?
my offering is.
A book a got for Christmas fell on my head....
I've only got myshelf to blame
look forward to your input
my offering is.
A book a got for Christmas fell on my head....
I've only got myshelf to blame
look forward to your input
Last edited by TWDB on Fri Dec 23, 2022 9:03 am, edited 1 time in total.
Update: taken a new job hopefully confidence and positivity will return with new challenge - scary though leaving current place after 16 years (6 years H&S !)
(previous signature: was motivated once ..................... searching to get it back !)
hopefully confidence and positivity will return with new challenge - scary though leaving current place after 16 years (6 years H&S !) (previous signature: was motivated once ..................... searching to get it back !
)-
wendolene26
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Re: H&S Christmas jokes
I thought I'd engage the services of Mr Google to find some other H&S festive jokes to add to this thread...where does Google take me? yup - straight to this thread... 
You are only a millimetre or a millisecond away from the next incident.
