Humerous Phrases...
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- wendolene26
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Re: Humerous Phrases...
One that's been used in our office frequently this week is "that won't fly" (meaning approval won't be granted)
I feel like singing the Orville song.... I wish I could fly..... right up to the sky...... but I can't.
I feel like singing the Orville song.... I wish I could fly..... right up to the sky...... but I can't.
You are only a millimetre or a millisecond away from the next incident.
Re: Humerous Phrases...
You can!wendolene26 wrote:One that's been used in our office frequently this week is "that won't fly" (meaning approval won't be granted)
I feel like singing the Orville song.... I wish I could fly..... right up to the sky...... but I can't.
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Re: Humerous Phrases...
An ex boss of mine used to say, when coming up against resistance, JFDI (Just Do It). I confess it's one I now use myself far more than I should need to!!
Last edited by Alexis on Fri Oct 14, 2016 3:10 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Reason: Sorry but removed expletives as per our ICRA status.
Reason: Sorry but removed expletives as per our ICRA status.
- kevlarion
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Re: Humerous Phrases...
- Take a number! (when I'm too busy)
- Can you repeat that in human ? (usually when someone is getting too technical)
- That won't scan! (from Bourne films)
- Where do you want the flowers sent ? (when I have to reprimand someone in a workshop for putting perceived production targets before their own or other people's safety)
- If you want to float an idea join the navy.
- Driftwood ! (used as a name, as in "Manuel !")
- What do you want to be when you grow up ?
- Taking the long view of the big picture going forwards we should stop using TLAs and tired american cliches, instead thinking outside of the box and being more proactive in order to work smarter instead of harder and ensuring a positive outcome for everyone. (Usually followed by a statement about excrement.)
- If I wanted to smell bull**** I would work on a farm.
- My crystal ball isn't online at the moment.
- Have you seen that new reality show "Can't Think, Won't Think" ?
- Donde esta la cerveza ? (where is the beer)
- You'll get an embarrasing rash (when I'm reprimanding someone for breaking COSHH controls)
If it isn't broken, that doesn't mean you can't improve it. (Do three negatives make a positive ?)
- kevlarion
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Re: Humerous Phrases...
It's a computer, a jumped up abacus, a pocket calculator with delusions of granduer...
If excel was meant to collect data it would be called a database, like access is.
If excel was meant for writing reports it would be called a word processor... like word is.
You did a drawing on powerpoint ? Is it to scale ?
Use the microsoft fix... if it's not doing what you want, switch it off and on again.
If it's still not working, just switch it off and use a pen(cil).
Have you fed the mouse ?
There it is ! (pointing in a random direction)
Have you considered the possibility that the computer might not be the problem ?
If excel was meant to collect data it would be called a database, like access is.
If excel was meant for writing reports it would be called a word processor... like word is.
You did a drawing on powerpoint ? Is it to scale ?
Use the microsoft fix... if it's not doing what you want, switch it off and on again.
If it's still not working, just switch it off and use a pen(cil).
Have you fed the mouse ?
There it is ! (pointing in a random direction)
Have you considered the possibility that the computer might not be the problem ?
If it isn't broken, that doesn't mean you can't improve it. (Do three negatives make a positive ?)
- grim72
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Re: Humerous Phrases...
Reading through some of these makes me wonder if this is where David Brent gets his schooling :-) Speaking of which there are more than a few more cringeworthy ones courtesy of him here: http://www.allgreatquotes.com/david_brent_quotes.shtml" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;
Incidentally "low hanging fruits" is a personal irritation, I break out in a cold sweat every time I hear someone mutter that nugget.
Incidentally "low hanging fruits" is a personal irritation, I break out in a cold sweat every time I hear someone mutter that nugget.
Grim72
Good to Go Safety - Providing you with a safer workplace
Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in his shoes. That way, when you criticize him, you're a mile away and you have his shoes
Good to Go Safety - Providing you with a safer workplace
Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in his shoes. That way, when you criticize him, you're a mile away and you have his shoes
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Re: Humerous Phrases...
One of my workmates favourites is the aforementioned 'there's no i in team', to which I reply, 'no but there is an M and an E !.
- Alexis
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Re: Humerous Phrases...
"A candle loses none of its light by lighting another candle."
Hundreds of FREE Health & Safety Downloads Here
Hundreds of FREE Health & Safety Downloads Here
Re: Humerous Phrases...
wendolene26 wrote:The early bird gets the worm........
........but the early worm gets got!